"Oh, Beatrice! I'm spo glad you're OK!"
"Oh, you, too Adrianna, you too!"
"These others look pretty bad. Have you been helping them?"
"Shhh - they don't all know I'm a doctor, and I'd like to keep it that way!"
"So what should we talk about?"
"Dunno. Do you know any jokes?"
"No, do you, Beatrice?"
"Yes!"
Beatrice used to tell jokes all the time. In fact, she developed quite an ADDICTION to them. Thrilled to have this opportunity to tell ehr favorites, she begins...
What do you call a person who really likes a stiff breeze?
I don't know, what?
A fan of a fan!
Good one!
What do you say if you see a letter floating in the ocean?
Ha! What, Beatrice?
I see a "C" in the sea!
Okay, okay, that's funny too.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Panther.
Panther who?
Panther what I wear, how about you?
Oh!
Knock, knock?
Who's there?
Interrupting cow.
Interrupting cow wh-
Moo!
Ha ha ha!
Knock, knock.
Seriously, doesn't any house have a door bell?
Okay... ding dong.
Wait a minute. I just got out of the shower.
Ha ha ha. Okay.
Alright, here I am. Who's there?
Um... I don't remember anymore!
My bad. Know any other jokes?
Yeah. Plenty of 'em! Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Banana.
Banana who?
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Banana.
Banana who?
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Orange.
Orange who?
ORANGE YOU GLAD I DIDN’T SAY BANANA!
OK, the mother says, "Come on, Victor, you have to get out of bed or you'll be late for school."
Victor says, "Mom, do I have to? All the teachers hate me, and all the students hate me, too."
Mother says, "Yes, you do."
Victor says, "Give me one good reason."
Mother gives him two: "Because you're 34 years old, and you're the principal."
A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named "Amal." The other goes to a family in Spain; they name him "Juan". Years later, Juan sends a picture of himself to his mum. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wishes she also had a picture of Amal. Her husband responds, "But they are twins. If you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal."
Beatrice, you are a strange chick, you know that?
Wait till you hear this one!The following short quiz consists of 4 questions and tells whether you are qualified to be a "professional". Scroll down for the answers after you have thought about it. The questions are not that difficult.
1. How do you put a giraffe into a refrigerator? The correct answer is: Open the refrigerator, put in the giraffe and close the door. This question tests whether you tend to do simple things in an overly complicated way.
2. How do you put an elephant into a refrigerator ? Wrong Answer: Open the refrigerator, put in the elephant and close the refrigerator. Correct Answer: Open the refrigerator, take out the giraffe, put in the elephant and close the door. This tests your ability to think through the repercussions of your actions.
3. The Lion King is hosting an animal conference, all the animals attend except one. Which animal does not attend? Correct Answer: The Elephant. The Elephant is in the refrigerator. This tests your memory. OK, even if you did not answer the first three questions, correctly you still have one more chance to show your abilities.
4. There is a river you must cross. But it is inhabited by crocodiles. How do you manage it? Correct Answer: You swim across. All the crocodiles are attending the animal meeting. This tests whether you learn quickly from your mistakes. According to Andersen Consulting Worldwide, around 90% of the professionals they tested got all questions wrong. But many preschoolers got several correct answers. Anderson Consulting says this conclusively disproves the theory that most professionals have the brains of a four year old.
OK, Beatrice. I think that'll be enough for today.
"Oh, you, too Adrianna, you too!"
"These others look pretty bad. Have you been helping them?"
"Shhh - they don't all know I'm a doctor, and I'd like to keep it that way!"
"So what should we talk about?"
"Dunno. Do you know any jokes?"
"No, do you, Beatrice?"
"Yes!"
Beatrice used to tell jokes all the time. In fact, she developed quite an ADDICTION to them. Thrilled to have this opportunity to tell ehr favorites, she begins...
What do you call a person who really likes a stiff breeze?
I don't know, what?
A fan of a fan!
Good one!
What do you say if you see a letter floating in the ocean?
Ha! What, Beatrice?
I see a "C" in the sea!
Okay, okay, that's funny too.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Panther.
Panther who?
Panther what I wear, how about you?
Oh!
Knock, knock?
Who's there?
Interrupting cow.
Interrupting cow wh-
Moo!
Ha ha ha!
Knock, knock.
Seriously, doesn't any house have a door bell?
Okay... ding dong.
Wait a minute. I just got out of the shower.
Ha ha ha. Okay.
Alright, here I am. Who's there?
Um... I don't remember anymore!
My bad. Know any other jokes?
Yeah. Plenty of 'em! Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Banana.
Banana who?
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Banana.
Banana who?
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Orange.
Orange who?
ORANGE YOU GLAD I DIDN’T SAY BANANA!
OK, the mother says, "Come on, Victor, you have to get out of bed or you'll be late for school."
Victor says, "Mom, do I have to? All the teachers hate me, and all the students hate me, too."
Mother says, "Yes, you do."
Victor says, "Give me one good reason."
Mother gives him two: "Because you're 34 years old, and you're the principal."
A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named "Amal." The other goes to a family in Spain; they name him "Juan". Years later, Juan sends a picture of himself to his mum. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wishes she also had a picture of Amal. Her husband responds, "But they are twins. If you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal."
Beatrice, you are a strange chick, you know that?
Wait till you hear this one! The following short quiz consists of 4 questions and tells whether you are qualified to be a "professional". Scroll down for the answers after you have thought about it. The questions are not that difficult.
1. How do you put a giraffe into a refrigerator? The correct answer is: Open the refrigerator, put in the giraffe and close the door. This question tests whether you tend to do simple things in an overly complicated way.
2. How do you put an elephant into a refrigerator ? Wrong Answer: Open the refrigerator, put in the elephant and close the refrigerator. Correct Answer: Open the refrigerator, take out the giraffe, put in the elephant and close the door. This tests your ability to think through the repercussions of your actions.
3. The Lion King is hosting an animal conference, all the animals attend except one. Which animal does not attend? Correct Answer: The Elephant. The Elephant is in the refrigerator. This tests your memory. OK, even if you did not answer the first three questions, correctly you still have one more chance to show your abilities.
4. There is a river you must cross. But it is inhabited by crocodiles. How do you manage it? Correct Answer: You swim across. All the crocodiles are attending the animal meeting. This tests whether you learn quickly from your mistakes. According to Andersen Consulting Worldwide, around 90% of the professionals they tested got all questions wrong. But many preschoolers got several correct answers. Anderson Consulting says this conclusively disproves the theory that most professionals have the brains of a four year old.
OK, Beatrice. I think that'll be enough for today.
Yeah, okay.
Hey, what's that out in the water!?